


This is me trying (maybe I don't quite know what to say)

by crystals__99



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, Love Confessions, Teen Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:47:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27415225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crystals__99/pseuds/crystals__99
Summary: Set after 2x07.Landon left. Josie tells Hope she wants her to stay but Hope leaves Mystic Falls anyway, but for a secret reason.
Relationships: Hope Mikaelson/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 8
Kudos: 194





	This is me trying (maybe I don't quite know what to say)

When Josie asked Hope to stay, she meant it. Despite everything that happened between her and Landon, she knows that Hope cares. Not just about the school, but for her too.

At least she thought so. 

When Hope went to talk to her the night before, asking her if it was okay if she came back at the school, Josie was even surprised Hope would care about her feelings that much to ask for her approval. 

But Josie shouldn’t be surprised. It’s part of what makes Hope special. It’s part of the many reasons why she had a crush on her a few years back. 

It’s how Hope is able to see her when no one can, when not even Josie can. She can stay quiet and be sad or mad at the world, but somehow, Hope would see it.

Sometimes it’s like Hope can read her so well, even without really knowing what’s really going on with her. 

Like when she gifted her the necklace that makes quiet things heard. 

Hope is somehow always there. And if not there, always on her mind. 

But now she was gone. Josie doesn’t understand why, because Hope told her how she missed the school, Super Squad, Lizzie...and _her._

_She missed her._

So why would she leave? 

Josie harassed her dad all morning to get some information from him, because if Hope had left Mystic Falls, there was no way he didn’t know. 

Sometimes Josie is jealous of how her father seems to have Hope’s trust more than she does. She shouldn’t even expect that from her though, especially not after dating the boy she loves. 

Maybe she shouldn’t expect anything from Hope. The girl doesn’t owe her anything, right? Bringing back everyone’s memories of her was only the right thing to do. If Hope doesn’t want anything to do with her, Josie gets it. 

But even so, she can’t seem to let it go. 

After storming out of her dad’s office, Josie asks for help to one of the witches to do a locator spell. 

She doesn’t even know why she wasted her time begging her dad to talk, honestly.

Turns out, Hope was in New Orleans. Back home. 

That shouldn’t be too hard. 

Josie was in new Orleans just days before. She figures she can get there by herself again with no problems. She just needs to sneak out and don’t let Lizzie know about it. She would ask MG to cover for her, but Josie fears that if he knows and Lizzie pressures him to talk, he will crack.

Because when it’s about Lizzie, MG does not know how to stop himself from wanting to please her. 

So no. She’ll just go. She needs to talk to Hope and ask her why she left. 

Maybe she realized that without Landon there was no point in staying? Maybe she still doesn’t feel like she belongs there? 

That would be ridiculous. Hope belongs there. There with-

“Excuse me Miss? Miss?” 

Josie shakes herself from her train of thoughts and raises her gaze to the bus driver smiling at her. 

_Fuck._ She didn’t even hear it coming.

“Are you coming in or not?” He asks.

For a moment she wants to say no. It seems stupid. 

It is, right? 

Why run after someone who doesn’t want to stay? 

Maybe Josie is the advocate of lost causes, but Hope isn’t lost to her. 

She’s her friend. And Josie would do anything for her friends. Including taking an eleven hours bus trip to New Orleans. 

Between thinking what she’ll say to Hope and dodging calls from Lizzie and her dad, she falls asleep twice during the ride and wakes up as soon as she hears the driver call the last stop. 

Luckily she remembers which way she has to go, but despite being in New Orleans before, Josie is not an expert. Neither she knows where Hope lives. 

The only thing she can do is head to the bar where she went the first time she was here, Rousseau’s.

The only problem is...she would have to talk to Freya. 

_Shit._

She should’ve thought this through. 

She literally took the woman down with a dark spell and left her unconscious on the floor. And never apologized for it.

Maybe she will be forgiving since Josie did use the spell to bring back the memories of Hope, her niece.

Yes, she will. For sure.

As Josie walks up to the counter, Freya is cleaning some glasses and giving Josie her backs. But once she’s done, she turns around and instantly recognizes the familiar brunette standing in front of her. 

A light smirk forms on her lips, then she gets back to her chores, but starts talking to Josie. 

“And what are you here for now?”

Josie rests her arms on the counter, her hands intertwined together. She clears her throat and looks suspiciously around her. 

Why is she acting like a drug dealer? 

“I need to talk to Hope. Is she here?” 

Freya lets out an amused chuckle and then rests her hands on the counter to give Josie her full attention. Freya Mikaelson was and is still intimidating, even if this is the second time Josie has to talk to her. 

It must be a Mikaelson thing.

“You’re telling me you went through all this trouble just to talk to her? Don’t you guys have phones? Or I don’t know...magic?” She wonders with sarcasm.

_Shit, again._

She really should’ve thought this through.

_Seriously Josie, get your shit together._

“I- I figured it was best if I talked to her in person.” 

Freya gives her a suspicious look and observes Josie as if she is a lab experiment. Maybe she’s still mad about their last encounter. Maybe she will torture her. Yes. Maybe she will.

No. She couldn’t. Hope would never allow it, right? 

While being absorbed in her deadly thoughts, Freya finally gives in and picks up a piece of paper and a pen, and starts writing down some coordinates. 

When she’s done, she slides the piece of paper under Josie’s nose. 

“She’s at the bayou. It’s not really far from here. I would offer to drive you but...” She gestures at the place they’re in, and Josie understands.

“Of course. Don’t worry. I think I can get there by myself.” She offers a gentle smile.

As Josie is about to turn her back and walk away, Freya stops her with a question.

“What are you to my niece exactly?” 

Josie turns around, clearly taken aback by the question, although Freya looks genuinely both confused and curious. 

“You came here, looked into her history, asked for my help and then brought back our memories of her, against your best interests, I presume.” Freya says, “And now you’re here again.” 

Josie shrugs. “I’m...just a friend.” 

Freya nods in understanding, although she doesn’t look so convinced, but Josie still walks away before things can get any more awkward.

What was she to Hope? 

How would she know? Amongst every good thing, Hope is also confusing. 

Josie thought they were okay, but apparently they weren’t. Josie thought they were friends, but maybe she looked too much into it. 

Maybe they are simply acquaintances. They go to the same school, sit in the same classes, exchange a few words sometimes, but that’s it. 

It’s not like Hope asks for _her_ whenever she needs help and not _anyone else._

That probably doesn’t mean anything. Josie has to accept that. But she also wants to know why Hope left. 

After twenty minutes walking into the woods, Josie finally sees a cabin right next to a lake. It looks peaceful and quiet. The water shines so beautifully because of the sun, but the air is still chilly, since the rest of the place is shaded by high trees.

Josie walks silently to the cabin and knocks three times on the door. 

She feels so nervous and still doesn’t know what she will say. She has to improvise, although she’s not really good at improvising, but she’ll find a way. 

Five seconds later, the door bursts open, showing a surprised redhead girl. Hope’s air fall wet on her shoulders, and all Josie can think is how pretty she looks all the time.

Josie hints a nervous smile and waves at her. “Hi.” 

Hope blinks twice, then seems to relax the hold she has on the door. “Hey...what are you doing here?” Her voice soft and genuinely confused.

“Well, um, you left, just like that. And...I was wondering where you were and-“

“And you took an eleven hours ride to find me?” Hope scoffs and hints a small smile.

Josie blushes but tries to hide it. 

This is harder than she thought. 

She should just go straight to the point and get this over with. Hope will most likely push her away, but she still has to try. 

“You left.” She bursts out. 

Her tone is accusatory, she’s aware. She meant it to sound that way. Hope stares at her uneasy, she looks almost guilty and sorry. She tries to look away, but somehow her gaze always find its way back to Josie’s.

“I told you I wanted you to stay, but you still left. And I thought...I mean I thought that was what you wanted, to come back to the school. Then the next morning you’re just gone. What changed?”

Hope bites her bottom lip and brings her arms around her stomach as a hug, lowering her gaze to the floor while Josie keeps staring at her expectantly.

“I changed my mind.” She simply says.

Josie raises her eyebrows at first, but then her stunned expression is replaced by a sad pout. Without noticing, she adopts the same posture as Hope. 

“You...” Josie stumbles upon her words for a moment, “How? W-why?” She frowns.

Hope’s long pauses makes it seem like either she doesn’t want to talk, or she’s lying to Josie’s face. 

“I thought staying at the school was what I wanted, but then I kept thinking about it and leaving just seemed like the best thing to do.” 

_“For who?”_

Hope frowns at Josie’s sudden outburst of anger. “Why are you so mad?” 

“I’m not!-“ She cuts her tongue to stop herself from yelling at the Tribrid, but she’s so frustrated at Hope right now, she could say anything. 

She needs to control herself. 

“I just don’t get why. It doesn’t make sense to me.” She says more calmly.

“Well, it does to me.” 

Josie shakes her head while her hands start moving frantically into the air. 

“Is this because of Landon? If it is, why are you here and not looking for him?” 

“It’s not about him. I just wanted to come back home to clear my head. Just- just for a while, m- maybe.” She stutters.

Josie narrows her eyes suspiciously, noticing how Hope kept shrugging and not meeting her eyes. “You’re lying.” 

Hope scoffs a laugh and finally comes out of the cabin and starts walking far from the siphoner, still keeping her eyes glued to the ground. 

“Don’t push it, Josie. Please.”

“Why? Because you don’t want anyone to care? That’s what you expected when you left? That you could just disappear again and no one would even notice?”

Hope finally meets Josie’s angry gaze, and lets out a small sigh. She keeps staring softly at the brunette, and just like that it’s like Josie is put under a calming spell. Hope makes her feel so many mixed things, like anger and tenderness at the same time.

She’s suddenly calm. Mostly sad, but not mad. She just wants to know if that’s how Hope really feels. If she really thinks that no one cares. 

“Maybe?” Hope shrugs.

Josie scoffs. “Did you think _I_ wouldn’t notice?”

Hope keeps moving nervously her right foot, digging into the ground like a dog or a wolf would. She barely looks at Josie. 

“I guess you did. Since...you’re here.” She points out the obvious.

Josie keeps nodding her head while staring into blue irises, but then moves her eyes to the lake, while silence falls between them. 

“Is that what this is about, then? You’re closing up again just because?” 

Hope shakes her had and sighs tiredly. 

“It’s not that, Josie...”

“What could possibly drive you away if not Landon? I mean I thought you loved him, so it would’ve made sense if you went to find him.” 

“Like you said, he made his choice.” 

Josie’s frustration rises again, and her next outburst seems to work like a domino effect. 

“Then what, Hope?!”

The tribrid still won’t look at her. Her nervousness increases. 

“Can you at least look at me?!” Josie yells again. 

“I left because of you!” 

Josie unconsciously stumbles back and stares at Hope in confusion. 

“But I- I wanted you to stay. I never-“ 

“When I came back from Malivore...I came to the school. You guys were the first people I wanted to see. You and Landon were having a movie night at the Mill...I saw you-“

_No. No, no no no no._

“Hope.”

“You both looked so happy.” She pauses, “And I was _so_ jealous.” 

Josie feels guilty again. For a moment, she thinks about apologizing. She didn’t know Hope saw that. She didn’t know she had hurt Hope while the other girl was willing to keep her secret just for the sake of her happiness. Maybe Hope was her friend after all.

“But, um, not of you.” Hope adds, bringing Josie out of her thoughts. She stares deeply into the siphoner’s sad eyes, and breathes in the next words she lets out. “Of him. I was...jealous of him.” 

Josie breathes in for a moment, but the air somehow gets stuck in her throat and never reaches her lungs, and she feels like she’s stopped breathing at all. 

This doesn’t make any sense. 

“W-what are you saying, Hope?” Josie asks.

Her head is about to explode. She doesn’t know if it’s because she’s tired from the trip or because her heart has reached her throat. She might feel sick. Or even faint.

“I’m saying...” She exhales deeply, taking a few steps closer to the brunette without unlocking their eyes, “That I’ve been having these- _feelings..._ ” She takes another shaky breath, “Feelings for you.” 

Josie feels her heart racing everywhere. It must be trying to dig its way out because she definitely feels like she’s losing it. 

She’s shaking, while trying to process what Hope just confessed.

She never in a million years would’ve thought that Hope Mikaelson could even like her, let alone have feelings for her. 

How did this happen? When? 

She thought Hope was happy with Landon, that she was in pain because she had to see Landon together with her. 

How could she not see this?

Josie blinks at least ten times before trying to speak again. “I thought you were in love with Landon.” 

Hope smiles sadly. “I guess I was...for a while.” She stops to think, “Or maybe I just thought I was.” 

Josie stares at the redhead with a new light in her eyes. 

"Are you sure about this?" 

Hope smiles widely at the siphoner in front of her. Then the smile slowly fades when she starts thinking about everything that led her to this conclusion.

"I had a crush on you when we were fourteen." She starts saying, catching the shocked expression on Josie's face. "When you told me you had a crush on me, it felt surreal." She chuckles. 

Josie hints a soft smile too.

"But I didn't say anything back then because I just didn't think it through at the time. And I was with Landon and I was...happy-ish." She shrugs. "I always wondered, though. What we could’ve been if you hadn’t burned down my room and I had found the note.” She says smiling softly. 

Josie lowers her gaze and kicks a small rock while nervously biting her bottom lip. 

“I’m still not mad because of that, by the way.” 

Josie looks back at her, confusion in her face. “Why though? I never understood that. You should have hated me. You lost your things, the painting...”

“Isn’t it obvious by now?” Hope shrugs and looks at Josie with the warmest smile. 

Josie hides a pleased smile. “So what I get from this is that you have a soft spot for me. And I can get away with anything?”

Hope lets out a genuine laugh and nods. “If you want to put it like that, fine.”

They lose each other in longing stares for what seems like forever, until Hope eventually looks away and gets serious again. 

“The day you were shot was the day I thought I was going to lose you. I mean, we were barely friends and yet I felt like the world was crashing down because I didn't know how to save you. And I blamed it on me. But then your dad made me notice a hole in my shirt...I figured one of the bullets must've gotten me while I was trying to protect you. So I realized my blood could heal you." 

Josie presses her lips together without looking away. 

"I thought you were coming back." Josie whispers sadly.

Hope gives her an apologizing look. "I know, I'm sorry." 

"I think I felt you disappear from my memories." Hope frowns, but Josie goes on to explain. "Maybe it was because I had your blood in my system...I don't know. But I felt you go." 

There's a moment of silence. Josie shakes her head and sighs lightly. Her eyes are teary, just like Hope's.

"I never want to feel that again." 

A tear streams down Hope's cheek, which the girl quickly wipes away, but she knows Josie saw it anyway. The brunette walks closer and gently takes Hope's hand in hers. 

The Tribrid stares at their hands together for a moment, and it gives her a sudden comfort she rarely ever felt before. 

It's magical. 

"I don’t want you to disappear from my life. I don’t want you to disappear at all. Come back with me Hope, please." Josie whispers with a shaky voice.

Hope smiles at her and holds her hand tighter. 

“Does this mean..."

"That I have feelings for you, too?" Josie smiles, "Who wouldn’t? It would be impossible not to." 

Hope suddenly blushes, and both of them start laughing together both at the awkwardness and happiness of the moment. 

Not just happy-ish.

An unusual, new, good kind of happiness.

"Can I...can I kiss you?" Hope asks in a shy tone. 

Josie smiles widely and nods in affirmation. "Yes. Yes, you can kiss me."


End file.
